


3 Times Rafael Called Noah his Son + 1 Time Noah Called Rafael his Dad

by LakeYarina



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: 3 + 1 Things, Developing Relationship, F/M, Family, Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, Parenthood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-31
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-25 12:29:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22496128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LakeYarina/pseuds/LakeYarina
Summary: the title about sums it up, it's a 3+1 story about family
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Olivia Benson
Comments: 5
Kudos: 70





	3 Times Rafael Called Noah his Son + 1 Time Noah Called Rafael his Dad

**Author's Note:**

> hi friends! i normally write for barisi only but my niche is rafael with kids, which is where the idea for this came from. enjoy!

**1.**  
The first time Rafael called Noah his son the circumstances were...less than ideal. He had been dating Olivia for a few months, and they had agreed that Rafael spending more one on one time with Noah would make telling him about their new relationship a little less awkward. That Saturday afternoon he had picked Noah up from the apartment to take him to the park, Noah talking his ear off about school as they walked hand in hand down the sidewalk. When they reached the playground Noah took his hand out of Rafael’s, looking at him expectantly.

“Go play with your friends, but stay where I can see you, okay?” Rafael said as he sat down, Noah giving him an affirmative nod before running off and joining a group of kids in the sandbox. Rafael kept an eye on him from where he was but turned his attention away when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket, pulling it out and unlocking the screen to a paragraph-length text from Rita complaining about the intern she had shadowing her. He typed a response and put his phone back in his pocket, only to look up and realize Noah wasn’t in the sandbox, or within his eyesight at all. He stood up from the park bench and walked in a circle around the playground, his chest growing tight when he didn’t spot him anywhere. 

“Noah!” He yelled, trying desperately not to sound panicked as he circled the grounds another time. And another. And another. And another. By his fourth circle he had picked up to a run, yelling Noah’s name repeatedly until he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Sir, are you okay?” He heard the voice of a woman say and turned around, breathing heavily.

‘My, my- kid. My son. He was right here and now he’s gone.” He rushed out, not even thinking about the fact that he had referred to Noah as his son instead of his go to, ‘my partner’s child’. The woman frowned, pulling a description out of him before joining him in circling the park. 

“Is that him?” He heard her say from a few feet behind him and whipped around, the woman pointing a ways ahead to where a group of kids appeared to be playing King of the Hill on a cluster of boulders. 

“Noah!” He yelled and the boy looked up, his face covered in guilt as he hopped down off the rock he was standing on and ran over. Rafael met him halfway and hugged him tightly the second he was close enough to be able to.

“I thought I told you to stay where I could see you?” He said breathlessly, running a hand through Noah’s hair. “I’m sorry Uncle Rafa, the fourth graders wanted to play and they normally don’t talk to us so- so I thought it would be fun.” He stuttered out, Rafael catching the face the woman, who had lingered around after helping him find the boy, shift when the kid he had told her was his son called him ‘Uncle Rafa’. 

“If you had asked I would have come with you, so do that next time. Okay?” Rafael continued, Noah nodding and looking past his head at the playground. “Can you push me on the swings?” He asked, Rafael giving an affirmative smile and standing back up, holding Noah’s hand just a little tighter as he let him lead the way.

 **2.**  
The second time Rafael called Noah his son was also filed under the ‘stories I am not looking forward to recounting to Olivia’ part of his brain. Him and Noah were out on another one and one outing, this one to Noah’s school book fair. It had been a good time, more for Noah than for Rafael’s wallet, but he would be the first to admit the six-year-old had him wrapped around his finger. It was nice out enough to walk home instead of taking the train, Noah insisting on holding all of the books in his hands instead of putting them in his bag because it made him ‘look like, really smart’. Rafael knew it wasn’t a hill worth dying on, and let him walk a step in front of him instead of making him hold his hand. They had come to the last crosswalk before they got back to Olivia’s building, Rafael beginning to let his mind wander to what she had told him the night before as he was leaving.

_”I think he’s ready, for us to tell him” She said with a smile, squeezing Rafael’s hand. “Are you sure?” He had responded, Olivia responding by pressing a kiss to his lips, cupping his face in one of her hands as she pulled away. “I am.”_

He was so lost in his train of thought that he didn’t hear Noah saying “come on, the sign says we still have five seconds”, or him stepping out in the street for that matter, until he heard a truck coming and realized Noah was no longer directly in front of him. He looked up and saw him about to cross directly into the truck’s path, lunging forward and using both arms to pull him back. The intensity of the movement sent them both tumbling to the ground, though thankfully on the curb instead of the street. The truck whizzed by and Rafael realized that A, he was hyperventilating, and B, that Noah had scraped up on his arms on the fall and had burst into tears. 

“Noah, mijo, are you okay?” He said as he tried to collect himself, helping him to his feet. Noah only sniffled, clutching his books, that he had kept an iron death grip on since the fall, to his chest. Rafael moved them out of the way of the other pedestrians and crouched down onto his level.

“I should have been paying more attention, I’m so, so sorry.” He said gently, Noah moving his books under one arm so he could wipe his face with his hand. “What does mijo mean?” He said, Rafael feeling his stomach drop again. _'Really kid, that’s what you’re worried about right now?'_ , he thought,

“It’s a Spanish word,” He started, deciding to obfuscate the truth and continue with “that’s another way of saying buddy or friend.” 

He felt bad lying, but they hadn’t even had the dating talk with Noah yet, and that definitely had to happen before the dad one. Noah took that for an answer though, turning his focus to the scrapes on his arms. “Mommy has bandaids, and I think I need a lot, a lot a lot.” He said and giggled, Rafael laughing and standing back up, taking the hand of the arm that wasn’t holding his books and walking more carefully across the street than he ever had in his life.

 **3.**  
Telling Noah about their relationship had gone well, much better than they were expecting it to. He practically bounced off the walls every time Olivia told him Rafael would be spending the night and somehow managed to wrap the man even tighter around his finger than he already had. Soon sleepovers turned into three-day stays, which turned into five-day stays, which turned into Rafael and Olivia celebrating their one year anniversary by moving Rafael out of his apartment and into hers. Noah had started helping them unpack boxes as soon as he came in the door from school, though he was quieter than usual. 

“How was school Noah?” Olivia tried, Noah just shrugging. She shot Rafael a worried glance, Rafael giving her an equally concerned look. He still didn't respond to her question, quietly taking Rafael’s law books out of the box he had just opened and setting them on the table. “You’re normally not this quiet kiddo, did something happen at school?” Rafael tried, Noah huffing before speaking without meeting his eyes. 

“My friend Luca speaks Spanish and I said you told me mijo means buddy and he said that was wrong ‘cause mijo means son.” He mumbled, Rafael nearly dropping the glass bowl he was holding on to the ground. He set it down, trying to avoid Olivia’s look. He called him mijo around her, frequently so, but had never explained that Noah didn’t know exactly what it meant. 

“Can you look at me please Noah?” Rafael said, Noah meeting his eyes hesitantly. He looked like he was about to cry, which made Rafael feel a million times worse than he already did.

“I’m sorry I lied to you. I should have told you what it really meant when you asked.” He continued, Noah looking back down and picking at a loose thread on his sweatshirt.

“You don’t want me to be your son?” He mumbled, the tears that were building his eyes starting to leak out and stream down his face. Rafael sighed, beckoning for Noah to come to him and crouching down. “Oh buddy, no. That's not why I didn't tell you." He said, Noah stepping closer to him hesitantly, Rafael putting a hand on his shoulder. 

“I said it meant friend because you didn’t know your mom and I were dating, and I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable if you didn’t like me referring to you as my son. It wasn’t because I don’t want you to be Noah, not at all.” He continued, Noah sniffling. 

“I like it because that makes you and me and mom a whole family like in my books.” He said quietly, a small smile on his face. Olivia had tried to instill in him his entire life that all families were different, but she knew from the way Noah adored Rafael that he saw him as a sort of missing puzzle piece. And she saw him in that way too. 

“When people see the photos of you that I have on my desk at work and ask who that is, I tell them that they’re photos of my son. My son, Noah, that I love so much.” Rafael continued, Noah stepping forward and wrapping his arms around his neck in a hug. “I love you too Rafa” He said into his shoulder, not letting go of him when he pulled back.

“We okay?” Rafael said and Noah nodded, Olivia squeezing Rafael’s shoulder as he stood back up.

“Well then, what do you say we take a break from unpacking and order pizza?”

 **\+ 1**  
Rafael was sitting in his office reviewing notes for the next day’s trial when his phone rang, Olivia’s caller ID flashing on the screen.

“Hey, everything good?” He said when he picked up, the heavy breath she took before she started talking alerting him that everything was _not_ good.

“Noah’s school called and said he got sick, but I have to run to St.Mercy’s to talk with a victim and Lucy’s not answering her phone and if you can’t it’s okay I can call our neighbor I’ll-”

“I got it, I got. Breathe Liv,” He said, grateful when he heard her take a deep breath in on the other end. “I love you, go do your job and let me take care of Noah.” He continued, Liv responding with “love you too” before she hung up and Rafael rushed out the door.  
-  
Rafael signed into the building and was walked down to the nurses office, his heart dropping when he saw Noah curled up on a cot in the corner. He walked over and crouched down on the floor, putting a hand on Noah’s back. 

“Hey sweetheart, your mom had to work but you’re going to come home with me. I’m sorry you don’t feel good.” 

Noah sniffled, sitting up slowly and reaching out for Rafael. He helped him down off the cot, getting a tissue to wipe some of the sweat off his face before picking him up. He was getting bigger by the day, probably to anyone else he was too big to be carried, but seeing the little boy so sick and miserable broke Rafael’s heart, and he could care less what the PTA sanctimommies thought of him.  
-  
“Rafa....” Noah groaned from the backseat, Rafael glancing at him in the rearview mirror. “We’re almost home.” He said before putting his foot on the gas and trying to get back to the apartment as fast as possible. They slid into the parking garage ten minutes later, Rafae; practically throwing himself out of the car to get Noah from the back seat, the boy squeezing his eyes shut and wincing. 

“Are you going to throw up again?”

“Nuh-uh. My head hurts.” He sniffled and rested his head on Rafael’s shoulder, the man feeling the heat from it through his button-up.  
-  
Once they got inside Rafael immediately took the boys sweatshirt and joggers off, getting him one of Rafael’s big Harvard t-shirts to cool off. He swam in the thing, but it was better than his winter clothes. He got him settled on the couch before going into the kitchen to figure out where Olivia kept the kid medicine. He had been living there full time for a couple of weeks, but was still getting used to the little nuances of the apartment. After a few minutes, he found what he was looking for, grateful on Noah’s behalf that it was in chewable form and not the kind of liquid medicine that made him gag when he was his age. 

“I found some medicine, I know you might not like it but it’ll make you feel better.” He said as he sat down next to him and passed him the tablets with a cup of water, Noah’s hands trembling as he took them.

He kept the medicine down, soon falling into a restless sleep on the couch. Rafael watched him toss around her a moment until he finally seemed to get comfortable in one position. He got up and stepped into the hallway to update Olivia on the phone, having just finished leaving her a voicemail when he heard soft crying from the living room. Shoving his phone back into his pocket, he rushed back in to the sight of Noah sitting up, still half asleep, and crying miserably. As out of it as he was, he noticed when Rafael came back, reaching out for him.

“Are you there? Did the bad guys get you?” He said deliriously, Rafael sitting down and putting Noah’s hands in his own. “I’m right here kiddo, you were just dreaming.” He said gently, Noah only crying hard, slumping forward against Rafael. Rafael adjusted them so Noah was sitting in his lap, head tucked into his shoulder.

“You can go back to sleep, it was just a dream.” He said softly, sighing when Noah increased his grip on his shirt like someone was going to rip him away. 

“Don’t leave me dad, please don’t go” Noah said, his small voice thick with worry. 

Rafael swallowed. Noah had never called him that before, and it made his heart thump out of his chest. But he could worry about that later, right now he had to wrack his brain for how to get him to sleep. “I’m not going anywhere, I just want you to get some rest.” He said, Noah his head up to look at him. “Mommy said you can sing.” He said quietly, Rafael laughing lightly and running a hand through Noah’s hair. “Lemme think of a song mijo.” He said and Noah turned his head back, sighing softly. Rafael wracked his brain for a song and settled on “Here Comes the Sun” singing softly as Noah drifted off again. By the end of the song he was asleep, Rafael carrying him down the hallway to his room and, somehow someway, getting him into bed without waking him up. He lingered in the doorway and watched him sleep for a moment before stepping out, the front door to the apartment opening almost in unison with Noah’s bedroom door closing.  
-  
“Rafa?” Olivia called out into the apartment, Rafael stepping back into the living room and motioning with his head back down the hallway, lowering her voice. 

“I just got him to sleep.” He said and Olivia nodded, stepping closer so they could talk quietly. 

“I’m sorry for dumping him on you like that.” She said, Rafael shaking his head and pressing a kiss to her hairline.

“Don’t say that Olivia, you aren’t dumping anything on me.” He said when he pulled back, his gaze landing back towards Noah’s room. “But there is something I wanted to mention.”

“There is?” She said, concerned. Rafael looked back at her, biting his lip.

“When I was trying to get him to sleep he called me dad. I didn’t say anything because he was so out of it but I don’t know if you want to encourage it or want me to tell him not to because I don’t know how long you want me around or what we’re doing and-” He rambled, Olvia cutting him off.

“Rafa, my sweet man,” Olivia said and put a hand on his face, running a thumb over his lip. 

“I want you around for a very long time. You just had a talk with Noah about how you consider him your son, so of course, I want him to call you dad. I want that, more than anything.” She continued, Rafael blinking back tears. 

“Me too.” He said, voice thick with emotion. As a little boy, Noah’s age, he never saw himself finding love, let alone being a dad. His own father had convinced him he would never be worthy of either of those things. But now there was Olivia, and Noah, and he wished desperately that he could go back and tell that younger, scared, version of himself that he would wind up with a life better than he could ever imagine.

**Author's Note:**

> 1) hope y'all enjoyed! i live for comments and even though barisi is my #1 i do love writing rafael with kids so if you have any prompts/ideas for noah & rafael stories feel free to throw 'em at me!
> 
> 2) if barisi with kids is your thing please check out my series Beautiful Boy, which I'm back to updating regularly (:
> 
> 3) find me on twitter @fourdayshome 
> 
> 4) this fic gave me an excuse to use one of my all time favorite words, sanctimommies, and for that i am forever grateful


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